• Coffee And Ice Cream

      Why does caffeine always give me a stomach ache?  I always get bloated and uncomfortable within an hour of having caffeine.  The stomach ache is super annoying because it gets in the way of me eating lunch or dinner specifically because my stomach feels all weird and queasy.  Caffeine also makes me not hungry.  I think that my stomach has it’s own brain and has decided that my body shouldn’t have caffeine so, it took matters into it’s own hands.  My stomach is like, “Jamie, I feel like being mean.  Now I will make you feel like crap and have to take a crap!”. 

    I’ve never been a huge coffee drinker, but as an “adult” in my early twenties, I developed a taste for it.  Plus, drinking coffee was cool right?  I got to complain like everyone else in college that my classes were to early and I needed coffee to function.  So the opposite of cool!    Then, when I started working, I always sent someone out to get me coffee, because I couldn’t make it through the day in that hell hole.  When I went back to school, I would get coffee in between classes or before my night class to keep me awake.  None of these times did I have any real issues.  I didn’t drink it every day and I never had more than a cup.  I was a basic coffee drinker like anyone else.

    Sometime in the past two years or so, I developed this completely unnecessary physical reaction to caffeinated products.  At first I didn’t make the connection.  I’d go out for brunch, get a cappuccino and be nauseous an hour later.  This started happening enough times, that I eventually realized it had to be what I was drinking.  Once I had my hypothesis, it was time to experiment.  One day I decided to order decaf, and you’ll never guess what happened!  Nothing,  I was fine.  From that point on, I tried to make a conscious effort to only drink decaffeinated drinks or drinks low in caffeine.  Strangely enough, I don’t have a problem drinking caffeinated tea and I certainly don’t have a problem eating chocolate! 

    Having tested and proven my theory correct, it would seem to be an easy task, avoiding caffeinated drinks.  But, it’s me and I don’t do anything easy.  Sometimes I forget to ask for decaf and sometimes simply don’t care because I am so exhausted I need a boost.  No matter the reason, the consequence remains the same.  Caffeine equals stomach ache and this week was no different.

    Earlier this week, I had the pleasure of tasting some delicious menu additions at the new Snowdays  location in Brooklyn, NY.  Everything I tasted was absolutely incredible.  The only glitch was that I completely spaced out on what it was that I was consuming.  The “Snowffagato” is shaved cream with a side of espresso to pour on top.  Basically, an affogato with a Snowdays twist. While enjoying my snowy treat, I had a brief moment of clarity and thought, “Jamie this is not decaf.”  I was already in too deep.  By the time I realized what I had done, it was too late.  So I thought, “fuck it” and continued to consume this delicious dessert.  I loved every spoonful.  Well, my mouth did. 

    Like clockwork, the caffeine started to kick in around the time I was getting home.  I plopped myself on the couch feeling full and stupid for causing my symptoms.  For the rest of the night I just sat around waiting for the discomfort to go away.  I drank a lot of water and finally around 11pm I was back to normal.  For approximately 5 hours I was a big bump on a log.  I didn’t have anything for dinner, which is extremely abnormal for me! 

    Now that a few days have passed, I would like to return to Snowdays.  I want to order another Snowffagato because it was so good!  But don’t worry, I will find out if they have decaf espresso first! 

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One Responseso far.

  1. Fred says:

    I’m sorry coffee doesn’t agree with you, but your writing style always agrees with me.
    Always very personal and you have an interesting take on everyday things ( kind of like Seinfeld)


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